63rd: SERIES OF TESTS AND TRIALS

Assalamualaikum

Currently listening:
1. Falling Like The Stars - James Arthur
2. Hold Me While You Wait - Lewis Capaldi

Though we just entered December, I gotta say I am so over 2019 already.

This year has been really something for me.

So many going ons, physically and emotionally.

But then again, who am I kidding right?

Honestly, I have been saying I had tough year since, urm I donno, 2014?

Part of me know what is my biggest struggle since the said year.

And by God, the struggle ain't getting any easier.

In fact, it's getting super hard each year.

And I feel like I'm drowning most of the time. Like I'm losing my grip over my whole emotions.

I don't really like to talk about my feelings much with people.

I mean, "hate" would be a strong word to use but it is true.

I hate confiding in people, not because I have trust issue. But I hate it when people say I am being a crybaby who is not grateful and to blind to see how blessed my life is.

Cross my heart, I am super grateful. I count my blessings everyday and that what keeps me going.

Source: Pinterest

Frustration is like my new shadow. Echoing every step that I take each day.

And what frustrates me more is when someone tell me I don't have the capacity to understand people who is going through a hard time.

Because these people said I know nothing about hardship.

My life seems easy, gliding like a piece of butter on a hot pan.

Well yeah, lemme show you what a puddle of boiling butter can do.

Just kidding. I am not a violent person. Or am I?

KIDDINGGG!

But guess what, I do wish my life IS easy. Like counting 1, 2, 3. Reciting A, B, C.

TBH, I wish everyone's life is easy.

Because I KNOW how hard it is to struggle each day.

Fighting your own emotions can be really tiresome.

But I believe even when the darkest days seem like forever, there will come brighter days that'll last even longer.

And when those bright days come, all the struggles before will be worth it and simply make the bright days even brighter and sweeter.

Woah, way to turn things around huh?

I donno. Even when I feel down, I just don't wanna be a sourpuss.

I am the kind of person who can start the day feeling gloomy but refuse to end it the same way.

I believe there is a bigger perspective on life that we all should try to see (regardless of how hard it is).

We just have to try.

To me, life consists of a series of tests and trials that lead to a blissful ending, one fine day.

But for now, I am with most of you guys out there, stuck along the series of super complex tests and trials.

This is me during my series of tests and trials in the form of wearing braces.

I had to endure this for almost 2 years.

I embraced through it and managed to get (an almost) perfectly aligned teeth.

So I guess, super worth it eyh?

Think again, this might not be a good example of my hardship.

This is why people say my life's like a piece of butter.

Wishing everyone to be blessed with a strong and beautiful heart to endure the hardship but never lose hope on the happy ending that awaits.

Salam menggemok and Toodles~

Assalamualaikum and Have a great day!