65th: STAY STRONG EVERYONE
Assalamualaikum
Currently diffusing YL: Thieves and Spearmint.
I miss writing.
So many things have happened this year and 2020 is definitely not like what my small self had imagined.
Things had been rough for everyone this year. Well, there are so many causes to begin with but especially because of the Covid-19 pandemic.
What is Covid-19?
Well, it's a scary virus that just keeps on evolving and mutating while attacking many.
It is sneaky and you never know when it's near and suddenly it is too late, you're already contracted by it.
And worst, it is a global pandemic and every country around the world are currently struggling to fight it including us here in Malaysia.
Tbh I have lost count how many phases of Movement Control Order (MCO) we have been in, so lets say maybe now we are in our 6th or 7th phase of MCO, I think.
Since March, I have gone through 3 times of swab tests due to countless reasons (close contact, to be warded into a hospital therefore it's one of the procedures, to organize an event with our King, YDPA).
Alhamdulillah all 3 of em was negative. But it was not a pleasant experience.
So now I am currently praying hard since this morning to not to have to go through with a 4th one.
Why another test? Coz I just found out today that one of my bosses at work is a close contact to a confirmed positive Covid-19 patient (their spouse to be exact).
Talking about a mood killer situation eh.
I have nothing but loads of prayer for my boss to be tested negative so that my colleagues and I do not have to go for swab test and can have our peace of mind.
My heart boutta explode when I heard about the news coz my mom and nenek are here with me and the last thing I want is for them to be exposed to this virus.
My sole reason for them to stay with me during this Conditional MCO (CMCO) is because I want them to be safe and protected.
And now, Idk.
I'm kinda frustrated actually.
Frustrated due to what? I can't pinpoint for sure.
Maybe with the situation. Maybe with the system. Maybe with people. Maybe with myself.
Or maybe with all of those.
Frustrated with myself because of my choice of career that forced me to work in the system with all these people thus exposed my loved ones to this kinda situation.
I know I sound like an immature and weak person.
Trust me, I realize that and I hate being that person, if asked some other time.
But now, I think I have the right to feel this coz I feel helpless.
Helpless people say things with their emotions and rn, my emotions are all over.
This is actually quite a composed form of words I'm using and I am proud of myself for being able to do so.
I look around. I see struggles everywhere.
Everyone is struggling. Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow. Every single day of this pandemic time.
People are suffering due to the virus. Directly and indirectly.
Some lost their loved ones from the virus.
Some lost their source of incomes because their companies can't sustained in times like now.
Some lost interest in doing their everyday routines coz they are drained (trust me, my future self, the world presently is really, really harsh and hard. It is definitely not for everyone).
Gee, I do sound like a depressed person rn.
Well, while waiting for my boss to inform us all about her Covid-19 swab test result (which hopefully can be known tomorrow or lusa), lets just pray for a better future.
Lets see what I'd like to pray for:
1. Covid-19 vaccines to be perfected real soon.
2. Happier and easier times for everyone.
3. My emotions to be collected once again.
4. Protection for my loved ones.
5. My boss's swab test to be negative (can't help but circle back to this. Please God).
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